Where to start?
As I sit here, having been sick for a week, I ponder. The latest diagnosis is strep, double ear ache with one perforated ear drum, double pink eye and sinusitis. Overall, I feel horrible.
But it’s not just this sickness that has been feeling bad. I’ve been generally feeling crappy lately. And I’m not talking mood.
Confession Time …
Looking over these last six months, I can see how I got to this point. Don’t get me wrong, life has been great. Like really good. I’ve got a great family, love where I’m living, I have a great job. I have amazing friends who lift me up and make me smile. I get to do so many things that I love.
But I’ve let being busy take priority over taking care of me. When it comes to Me, there’s been no consistent workouts and eating habits have slipped. And when I say slipped, I mean plummeted. I’ve been fooling myself into thinking it’s all working, when it’s really not. I’ve gained weight, weight that I fought hard to lose.
I’m “supposed” to be a mentor, a coach. One who lifts others up and helps them reach their goals. But I have been failing miserably at that. I have withdrawn and ignored that area of my life.
I know better.
I know what it feels like to be fat and out of shape with a dependency on sugar and food in general.
I also know what it feels like to be fit and to eat to fuel your body. The difference is amazing. When my body is fit, I am able to push through the rough days and bounce back from illness. When my body is fit, it craves the things that are good. When my body is fit, I breath deeper and fully appreciate the good things in my life. When my body is fit, I have more to contribute to my family and those around me.
I know that this is never something that will just come to me, it’s something I have to work for.
It’s time to stop faking it.
No more pretending. Hoping it will change on it’s own. Hating myself. No more giving into the “inevitable”.
It’s time to decide, are you in or are you out?
Last night I was watching the opening episode of this season’s Biggest Loser. Jillian had 3 teammates who she was ready to send packing. One girl was especially not getting it. Jillian told her that she had to choose. She had to choose to workout or walk out the door. This girl chose to walk out the door, she admitted defeat, she couldn’t do the work (not just physical, but mental).
I realized this is me. This is each of us. Everyday we make decisions, choices, that determines our path. But there are a few times in life where we have big decisions to make. Pivotal. And those choices will greatly change the course you are on. There’s no straddling the line. It’s all in or all out.
Here’s my choice, I choose me. I am all in for a healthy me. I know what I need to do, I know what it takes and I am in. I am creating a future where I can live this life I love, not just endure it. Here’s my motto for 2013 …
That says it all right there. Here’s to 2013!
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